I lie in my bed, in my bedroom that I've been in for most of my life since age 7, and feel lucky that I am still able to live here with my parents. But I can't stand being around my sister and mother a lot of the time.. they just represent laziness and gluttony to me right now. Our dog died last year and to fill the void, and because she has no hobbies or friends, my mom watches cable tv a lot. I really don't get it.. how we've lived here 17 years, and she's made little effort to make progress in her life, make friends, or become active in the community. I don't want to blame her, but doesn't she realize that that affects her daughters negatively somewhat? One can argue I could be more persistent or whatever because of having a mother who has done little other than be a housewife at home most of the time, but I think it's held me back in some ways, because I didn't have a role model of a strong woman who could work and be active.
I'm bitter right now but it is how I feel; the sooner I get a better job and move out, I can move on with my life.
2 comments:
In hindsight, I think the strong emotion expressed in this entry is in part due to a new med I had started (and have since stopped!).
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